Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Whatever happened to being sweet continued

Well I was gonna wait a bit before posting this but I got so much feedback that I thought I'd better go ahead and post again. Let me repeat what I have said lots of times before and that is I write out of my own experiences. I never deal with anything that God hasn't beat me over the head and heart with over and over again. Those of you who said you needed that,so did I. Those of you who said it convicted you, it did me too. I have struggled on every side of that issue and have learned lessons the easy way and the hard way at times.
I was talking to a lady after church Sunday who was hurting and struggling. I left thinking there's enough hurt just trying to live life without us trying to hurt each other. There are hurts on every pew every week and with everyone we pass throughout the week. We don't have to be friends with everyone but we do need to realize that we are all part of the same family if we belong to Christ. Some people are just plain mean and we don't have to let them in, but we are called to love.
One of the best books I have read in a long time is called the uncommon woman by susie larson. I could basicly highlight the entire book. Please read it. If you do and implement some of the things she stresses, it can change your life. I'll share some of the highlights:
...In every battle He remains the Most High God. He defends us. He fights for us. He delivers us.
...We determine ahead of time which conflicts are beneath us and we keep our lives free from the clutter of gossip, drama, and pettiness.
...It appears such a small thing to toss a few words around until you find that the people who are talking to you are also talking about you.
...To be free from the desire to control what other people say about us is wonderful.
...Trying to prevent others from having low conversations and engaging in petty gossip about us is like trying to keep the leaves from falling off of the trees on a windy fall day.
...I won't attempt to reason with those who have no inner conviction to be holy and honorable in the way they conduct themselves.
Prov. 29:25 deals with the fear of man.
We are walking in the fear of man when our thoughts are consumed with others' thoughts toward us, OR when our day goes south because we feel slighted by a comment or a cross look OR when we feel the need to get others on our side by speaking ill of another, OR when our goal is more to impress than to bless.
Can we all just agree together to try harder to give some people the benefit of the doubt, pray a lot more, and entrust those to God who continue to hurt us and misunderstand us? We also need to handle our problems the way the bible tells us to and go to those who hurt us and make it right. I love what Beth Moore says, "if you can't stay where you are successfully, then leave successfully". That usually means with our mouth closed and our hearts right. As my grandmother always said, "just kill 'em with kindness". James 3:9-10 is a good challenge for us all.
Moms and grandmoms, it all starts with us. We can't expect our teens to choose well when we don't. When we are in the middle of our own drama or place ourselves in the middle of their drama, it teaches them things we don't want to teach them. Let's be ever so careful what we model before them when it comes to our conflicts.
As a side note, I have noticed through years of ministry that when God is getting ready to do something big in a life or a church, Satan begins to attack. So often he uses those on the inside and so often it's petty and meaningless.

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