50

I celebrated my 50th birthday last week. Yes, I said celebrated! 😊 You can't prevent it anyway so you might as well celebrate it. Honestly, I've never been one to worry about my age, I just want to feel good and be healthy so at whatever age, I'm enjoying life. I told someone the only way I would go backwards is if I could take everything I know now with me! My 20s were terrific, my 30s were tremendous, my 40s were fabulous so I have high hopes for these 50s! I'm definitely at a stage where I focus more on fitness but I'm not obsessing over it. Just want to eat better and work out more consistently, be better at taking my vitamins which I've always been terrible at so that can only get better, and it has. I'm thrilled that I had my babies young so now I get to enjoy my grand girl. Another reason to stay fit because with her energy it's easy to see why young ones have the babies! I love the relationships I have with my children at this season and I love being with my man now more than ever. Marriage and family is something you have to prioritize and work at but nothing is more satisfying and worth the work. I poured everything I had and knew into family, made tons of mistakes but not from lack of trying. There's not one regret at 50 of making family the priority right below my relationship with Jesus. They've been here for me at times when no one else could be found and now they're all the greatest friends I have. I turned down things earlier in ministry to focus on the home. I missed retreats and conferences due to family schedules. I took heat for missing things that others wanted to prioritize for me. But now with kids grown and schedules changed, God has opened up opportunities to minister and serve and travel with my husband that weren't always possible before. That's kinda what this stage in life has been freed up to do. The no I chose to say at one season for the health and benefit of family can now be yes in this season. It's been worth the wait and God has blessed the decisions made on behalf of family. 

It has been especially true for me that, as the song says, the longer I serve Him (Jesus) the sweeter He grows! His Word becomes more and more precious to me. I've become much more protective of my time with Him than ever before even selfish if you will (wish I had been all along).  It has always been a hunger of mine probably because I grew up on it, just never remember a time I wasn't hearing about Jeaus or being taught His Word. It was a treasure to me in my twenties and I actually had to work harder at being intentional about it in my 30s. That was just a terribly hectic, busy time of life as it is for many. We had 4 little ones who became bigger and busy and active and so time alone with the Lord became something I had to fight for but precious. I pray hard for young moms now as they strive to guard that time with all the demands on them. Honestly, in my late 30s and all through my 40s it was my lifeline. I had always done in depth bible study but it got to the place where I couldn't get enough. I just buried myself in it along with prayer and journaling. By then there were 4 teenagers who not only weigh heavy on your schedule but your heart, mind, and emotions as well. Ministry at times was brutiful. That's the word we use to describe ministry many times. A combination of beautiful and brutal. God seemed to go on a mission in my life then of stretching me and changing me. Now I know why. He was preparing me for a total life change at a stage in life when most are totally settled in with no plans for change other than children moving to college and married children moving away. He was going to move us and change most everything about our life that we had settled into over 17 years. And thank you Jesus I'm so grateful now. I've grown more in love with Him over the past 5 years than I think I did in a lifetime before that. I've learned an entirely different side to his character and person. Over my life He's freed me from chains of insecurity, legalistic tendencies, and more but the greatest thing has been the freedom to just let go and Him allow me to be a part of a plan that I never imagined being able to be a part of. I've seen Him work and do things that make me stand with my mouth open and shake my head. Eddie and I find ourselves saying to one another often "He's up to something". He's tickled me to death and brought about desires I had but was even afraid to speak of because they seemed impossible at times. If He never blessed again I still couldn't have enough time to thank Him for everything that He's done just over the past few years. He's way better than I ever gave Him credit for. You know how you never even ask Him for something and then when He does it you think that's just what you wanted all along but didn't even know to ask?! It's been a lot of that lately! Sometimes I just have to tell Him to slow down so I can catch up on my praise. Please don't mistake all of this for meaning it's always smooth sailing. Just back in the fall I felt like I was going under the waves. When we were going through the process of moving and we had 1000 questions and 0 answers I felt like an elephant had taken up residence on my chest. We've had times when people turned on us that we never thought would. We've been lied about and to. We've felt the favor of God at times when we were on top of the mountain and we've felt it when we were in the pit of despair. The faith walk is a journey, a long journey. It's full of ups and downs and the longer we live the more we have. But one thing is for sure and I know it at 50 probably better than any other time and that is that I've tasted and seen that the Lord is good. And when all else and when all people fail, He never does. 

So yes, I celebrated 50 with the greatest people on the planet who lavished me with fun, gifts, laughter and my tears. They overwhelmed me to the point where I just had to shed a few tears as much as I fought it. No one anywhere could have a better family than me. I hope you feel that way towards yours too. Family is a treasured gift, the best gift I could ask for. 

Monday Morning Perspective

We wrapped our Live It series with a challenging message on prayer and were reminded not to leave it (all that we learned in James) but live it!! It was a high energy, packed house Sunday! We witnessed the baptism of 4 and one coming professing Christ. The energy was amazing and message powerful and convicting! 

In a nutshell, we basicly saw that there's never a situation or a circumstance, good or bad, that doesn't call for us to pray. This has been one of my favorite series because it's so practical and James challenges us on the everyday, ordinary things of life. 

Next week we start a 4 week series from Jonah and don't think Jonah won't be practical. It's an amazing book that will call for us to up our daily walk with God and live in obedience. 

Discipleship As We Go

I can imagine what many people think discipleship looks like in a pastor's home. Let me assure you that it looks as differently in every pastor's home as it does in every other home. We are not a one size fits all when it comes to discipleship. I'm sure that some did it similar to us, some very differently. Some would be shocked at the way we did it. Hopefully others would find some relief in the fact that we are much like them. We talked about it the other night as a family and with a few others that were at our house. We shared what ours looked like and they shared theirs. Some similarities. Some differences. I love asking mine if they regretted ways we did things. And I love their honesty. Love how they still remember those on the way to school talks. Rarely were they about academic stuff although we did do some cramming on test days, calling out those spelling words n using flash cards. Mostly it was about choices that they might face or how to behave or treat others. And they still remember mom's parting words right before they slammed the door, "make good choices today"! Boom, the door would slam. 

Maybe I'm shocking you to say we never did morning bible studies together before school. We didn't have a family altar. We talk so much about doing life with other people these days. Our goal was that they learn how to do life with Jesus and that we too would grow in that. It was discipleship, teaching opportunities, as we go, as we live, 

We approached that from the pattern we see in Deut 6:4-7. "Hear O Israel the Lord our God is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up." We didn't walk along the road much but we drove LOTS! And they were trapped in the car so it was a great talking time, talking time that had its foundation in biblical principles and living. We had lots of good talks while I cooked dinner and they hung out in the kitchen. Bedtime was a great time in each individual room for anything left unsaid that day and then prayer time with each. Dinners altogether were huge to us so the family table at dinner time set the stage for lots of talk about things going on and how we could have acted and reacted to situations and circumstancesof the day. Family night, for us it was Thursday night, was always a priority and gave opportunity to reign everyone in and reconnect if needed. During the summer months we bought each of them a bible study that was age appropriate and taught them how to sit with that and have their own time with God. That was to be done before the day's fun started and it taught them how they didn't have to have one of us or a teacher with them. They could sit with God's  Word and have that alone time with Him. One of ours said the other night in the discipleship conversation that it helped that we were together a lot as a family. And we were. Whether at home or on the move we were together a lot. Family time always trumped friend time, ours and theirs. It also helped to grow up with a pastor/dad who they sat under his preaching A LOT and then they saw him live it at home. Not a perfect mom and dad. With 4 kids at least one is always around when you blow it. But they saw real. They saw their dad throw his hat n yell a lot at ball games. They saw their mom lose her cool over things that didn't matter or if they did matter there was still probably a better way to handle it. There just wasn't a lot of pretense. Life is easier that way. It was just real. Sometimes raw or messy, but it was real. 

Our kids were tremendously blessed to grow up in a church where they were loved and allowed to be kids and grow. They had the best of the best when it came to student pastors who poured Jesus into them himself and set them up for amazing times to learn and grow in Christ. However, that never took away from our responsibility as parents. We were assigned by God to disciple our own kids. We were extremely picky about who had a hand in that as well. I'm thankful for all the hands that were in it with us as much as I'm thankful for all the parents who trusted me to disciple their kids. But I've always said that out of all the middle school girls, high school girls, college girls, grown girls that I was able to disciple, my own kids were my #1 discipleship group. If I lost them nothing else mattered. They were priority. I didn't  want anyone else to have the joy of discipling mine alone. I never saw that as our student ministers job. It was my pastor's job only because he was their dad in our case but it's a parents job first and foremost. I know that scares some parents. But all we have to do is stay a step ahead of them. Today there's so much to help us do that and do it  together. Don't be lazy either. It takes work. It takes time in the Word and prayer. But it's the greatest thing we will ever spend our time doing, learning the Word and passing that down to our children. None of us have all the answers. It's ok to be vulnerable in front of them and admit that. Grow together. Take that first step. Whether it's sitting down and opening the Word together, watching a video together or learning a few scriptures to give them when they're struggling in an area. When drama is going on share with them Luke 6 about loving their enemies. When the coach is making life miserable for them share some Matthew 5:44 about praying for those who persecute you. When school is hard and they feel overloaded give em Phil 4:13. And when girls, or boys, are just plain mean give them 2 Cor. 2:14-15 and show them how to spread that fragrance of Jesus! That's a huge way to disciple your kids. It's discipleship as we go. We have such a small window of time to do this. Many days I would love to go back and do it all over again, correct my mistakes, enjoy the fun of it, try it another way or give a different perspective. But we only get the one shot. You can do this. I know you can. And it will bring you more joy than your most favorite thing!!

Monday Morning Perspective

In some way, Sunday's message had to hit all of us. Maybe some a little harder than others but it was dead on! The waiting rooms of life: waiting for people to show up or maybe grow up, traffic waits, waiting for appointment times, waiting in lines. All kinds of waiting, some trivial, some very serious. But we all wait at different times for different things. 

Some of my fave quotes (too many to list them all):

In the inconveniences of life,how do we react?

The will of God will never take you where the grace of God won't see you through. 

God's hand is on the thermostat of the furnace. 

God is trying to develop you not destroy you. 

God's delays aren't His denials. 

Don't just quote Rom.8:28, believe it. 

When we lose patience, we lose control of our tongue. 

We think we are waiting on God, but maybe He is waiting on us. 

One day His patience will run out.

It was a great day at Fairview! So many faithful members serving! So many visitors, first timers and repeaters, continue to pour in! Lots of college students bringing energy and excitement! Blessed to serve where God is pouring out His Spirit and making an impact!

Cancel the Debt

I may be the only one who needs this and that's ok but I was in Deuteronomy 15 this morning and although this is one of those places in scripture we can tend to think isn't applicable, I saw it a bit differently this morn. I kept reading it over and over. It's a chapter on canceling debts. It's actually entitled in my bible as The Year for Canceling Debts. I began to think that just maybe in the year 2015 I might should implement this 15th chapter. Not in the strictest sense of the scripture because no one owes me anything. However I certainly need to be more generous towards the poor. I need to offer help to the needy. But I began to see it as another type of debt. I've been guilty before of holding things over people that I need to cancel. I've felt at times like there were a few people who "owed" me an apology for things said or done. I've felt at times that there were a few people who "owed" me an explanation. Some "owed" me a reason behind the hurt or offense. I need to cancel those debts. No, they haven't been paid and probably never will be. But I need to cancel them. I need to have no wicked thoughts and show no ill will. I need to give grace generously. I need to offer forgiveness without a grudging heart. This chapter says 5 times that "the Lord your God will bless you". I want that more than any debt paid off by people I feel "owe" me. I've been on the other end as well. People have kept me "on the hook" for things I've said or done whether intentionally or unintentionally. It's a terrible feeling! You become the reason for everything bad in their life and it's awful. You want to scream "please just take me off the hook"! They misread your intentions and take everything you say as a direct hit even when they were the furthest thing from your mind. I've been on both sides. It's freeing to cancel a debt and its freeing when someone else declares you debt free and takes you off the hook. Therefore, what if we all agreed to let 2015 be the year we all implement chapter 15 of Deuteronomy and CANCEL THE DEBT! Take others OFF THE HOOK! FORGIVE! LET IT GO! That doesn't mean God won't deal with the wrong. It doesn't mean it makes things right but it will make us alright. God has promised to bless and isn't that what we want more than anything else?! Let's want that to be what we want. Living debt free in 2015 and gracing others even when we could label them "in debt" to us is a better way to live and it's where we find the blessings God has promised. 

Monday Morning Perspective

What a great worship service yesterday. Amazing crowd that brought a lot of energy to worship! Blessed to witness the baptism of 2 adults and 2 students! Thankful to have the North Greenville University baseball team worship with us. And my husband shared a message on the state of the church which was loaded and powerful. To reflect on 2014 and even a little before and see how God has brought so much growth and blessed in so many ways is more than we could've hoped for. When we came here, we were praying and believing God for big things but, at least speaking for myself, He has totally blown my mind! And now going into 2015 with the opportunities He has brought us just makes me one big goosebump! My heart races with excitement at just the thought of what He is allowing us to be a part of and the ways we are going to be allowed to see Him work! Let 2015 be your year to find your place to connect and serve. The blessing is being involved and seeing first hand how God is working! And if your next step needs to be joining a church and planting yourself in a place where you can serve, we would love for you to join Fairview. There's plenty of places to plug in! Check out the message online, hear first hand what God has done and what's in store for us! Love my church family!!

2015 has begun

Our crowd rang in the new year at a Japanese restaurant, our fave dinner on New Year's Eve, and then a fam sleepover. Surprisingly we all kept our eyes open til after midnight. Had to fight it a few times but we made it. 

I love New Years! It's like turning the page in a brand new book that has crisp clean pages and has never been open. I love all the new possibilities and opportunities that lie ahead. We never know what lies ahead. Ill never forget that by the end of 2012 I was so ready to get that year over with even though 2013 held nothing but mystery ahead. One of my boys Michael Hux sent me the verse Deut 2:7 one morning late in 2012 that is still precious to me and got me through some ordeals. Scripture is always the answer to our anxiety, actually to all of our emotions. God proved so much then and showed us such favor and faithfulness that it's hard to do anything but trust Him as I walk into another brand new year that holds its own sense of mystery. 

I go into 2015 with anticipation and excitement of what God has in store. In some ways I'm living over my head in some areas He's called me to but I have a feeling that's where He likes me to live. It makes me trust Him more. My husband will share this Sunday a message on where we've been this past year and where we are headed. It's exciting, challenging, and overwhelming all at the same time. Favor is new and fresh and exciting as well but I'm challenged by what the new year brings for that ministry. 

My word for 2015 is MORE. I want to know Him MORE.  I want to witness Him work MORE. I want to do MORE for Him. I want to serve MORE. I want to see MORE of what He can do when I am MORE obedient, MORE trusting, MORE sold out to Him and His purpose. I want to see MORE of His glory. I'm believing Him for some big things this year. I'm believing that He can do whatever He chooses, however He chooses with whomever He chooses. I know Luke 1:45 is true that blessed is she who believes that what the Lord has said to her will be accomplished. I know nothing is impossible with Him. At one time I might have doubted that but I've seen too much and experienced too much to doubt Him now. 

What are you asking Him for this year? Is it of Him? Is it to glorify Him? If this is the year of His favor on your life, what are you asking Him for? Take some time to look back and see all that God has done, the times He has carried you. Then look ahead and walk in faith. Go through those open doors. Don't kick them down and don't manipulate the situation. But walk through when He opens that door. 

God has so much waiting for us. Some of it may be difficult as we begin that walk. Some may be hard. Some may cost us friends, relationships, material things. Trust me, we've lived through all of that. But He NEVER takes away without replacing it with something better. I told that to my kids all their lives and then lived it again as an adult. But it's true. He's all about our best. He is our victory our very great reward. He is a giver not a taker even when we feel that He is taking away. Don't stop and rest in your feelings. Keep moving ahead. Rest in the Truth! And the truth is that He is a God who is for us and loves us. 

A golf teacher once said to take dead aim. Aim for a specific place, a specific direction. This new year, take dead aim. Be specific in your prayers. Ask God for some specific direction. And obey Him.  He never leads us wrong. 

I'm holding tightly to Jeremiah 33:3 this year. "Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know." To have that I have to spend time with Him. Focusing more on my prayer life and more time in his word is a must. 

Surround yourself this year with those on the same path as you. Those who are striving to know Jesus better and follow Him. Life wasn't meant to be lived alone or in despair. We need each other. We need MORE Jesus!

Monday Morning Perspective

James 5 challenged us in the area of money. Money matters and how we spend it matters to God. Enough never seems to be enough and too often we have that mirror vision where it's all about us rather than window vision where we see out to all the opportunities we have to bless others. May God give us window vision. 

We are so often just like those James was talking to when it comes to money. We hoard stuff for ourselves displaying a selfish attitude of keep it rather than share it. We have a serious self indulgence problem as we spend everything on our parties and weddings and all things that make us happy. Interesting that 10 years after James spoke these words, Rome invaded and stole, plundered and destroyed them. 

Only 3 things stand forever: the Word of God, the kingdom of God and the people of God. 

Interesting question: who will be on your welcoming committee when you get to heaven? Thankfully since we can't take it with us, we can send it on ahead. May this be the year, 2015, that we send much on ahead!