I'm Johanna Joines, a member of Fairview
Baptist Church where I have attended all of my life. I have been married to Scott Joines for 23
years and we have two active boys, Daniel (18) and Will (13). I am a middle school teacher and love
volunteering with our Alive youth group and Favor women’s ministry. In my free time I enjoy reading and spending
time outside.
On December
20, 2008 my youngest son was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes. We were blindsided by this diagnosis and it
ripped my heart out to hear my 6 year old tell people that Santa brought him
diabetes for Christmas. I cried,
questioned, and became angry. I put on a
great front but I was falling apart inside.
I blamed myself wondering what I could have done differently to prevent
this from happening to my sweet boy. I
prayed that I would become sick and he would magically get better. It broke my heart to prick the finger of a
sleeping child. I became jealous of
people with healthy children and was angry that they weren’t going through what
my family was going through. My life
felt like it revolved around numbers from a blood sugar meter and I lost my
focus. It seemed as if his numbers
determined my worth as a mother. My life
was consumed by this diagnosis. One
night my oldest son said that I spent too much time researching and worrying
about this. Well that ripped my heart
out again and I realized that I had lost my focus. I then decided that if I was going to get
back to normal that I was going to have to consult my owner’s manual—The
Bible. My focus came back slowly and I
began to realize that this was just a bump in the road and I was meant to be
the mom of a diabetic child. Through
constant prayer and reading I began to relax enough to start sleeping
again. During this time certain
scriptures began to guide my life and I read them over and over again. I found comfort in Romans 8:28.
This disease is a part of my family for many
reasons—some of which I know and some of which I haven’t discovered yet. I have been able to help other moms and sit
back with tears in my eyes when my sweet boy sits down and talks to other
diabetic children and helps them. Will
has been a huge support to many kids even our school nurse. I know God will continue to reveal reasons
for this disease to me as life continues.
Through 1 Chronicles 29:1 I discovered that this is not my world and He
is in control of everything. Proverbs
3:5-6 became part of a prayer to help me trust in the Lord with all my heart
and to realize that everything on heaven and earth is precious to Him including
my children.
Other
scriptures that helped me through this and I hope will provide comfort to you:
Isaiah
55:8-10 His ways are much better than
mine and I need to trust in them always.
Isaiah53:3 He understands my pain so much better than
anyone else ever could.
Romans
11:33-34
Deuteronomy
32:4 It is impossible for Him to do evil
or wrong.
Job 34:10
Psalm 86:15
2 Timothy
2:13 Thank you God for remaining
faithful even when I am not showing faith in my times of pain. Your love is not determined by my behavior.
Colossians
1:17 He holds all things together even
when I feel that I cannot.
Hebrews
12:1-3
Romans
8:35-39
1 John 4:18
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