God always comes through

This post is part of Lysa TerKeurst’s Uninvited Book Blog Tour which I am delighted to be a part of along with many other inspiring bloggers. To learn more and join us, click here.

I'm a pastor's wife.  I love it.  I'm not defined by it, but it is one of the banners over my life along with wife, mother, grandmother, friend, sister, daughter, maybe even a few others. I've at times and in certain seasons been very comfortable in that role and thrived and other seasons have been spent in loneliness and even feeling rejected.  Everyone thinks the pastor's wife has many friends. Why wouldn't everyone want to be her friend?! Maybe because it's hard at times. Maybe because of their own expectations of what the pastor's wife is like or should be like gets in the way. That can be enough to send anyone running. The truth at least for me is that I have few friends. Few, honest-to-goodness, be there whenever, through the good and bad friends. And you find out who those are when the rocky seasons hit. Honestly, I'm ok with that.  Most of mine are in some form of ministry, we kind of get one another. Few live close by and even fewer are actual members of the church we serve in. Others are in churches we formerly served or staff we served alongside. Thankfully, in this particular season of life, my children are grown and so they are our very best friends. 

However, I can share with you a particularly rocky season filled with loneliness, where I feel like out of His mercy, and for my own good, He removed some people in the "friend" category from our life. The more I waited and expected support, the more I got questions from some and silence from others. Honestly the silence hurt the most. We still had family  and a few close trusted church leaders/friends who came alongside of us to support and pray over us, but for the most part it was my husband, me and Jesus, and that proved to be enough. It was a time when we were called crazy and many questioned us as to why we were making certain life changing moves. Of course, off the wall rumors and guessing games were a part of the journey. But God showed up in a big way and did He ever show off. He showed us things and became to us what He never could have become with people in the way.

It started in a mountain cabin on a getaway week just for my husband and I.  We went almost every year and this year didn't seem any different until we began to ask one another the hard questions.  You see we had been at a particular church for 17 years. My husband was pastor. We had raised our children there for the most part. Life was good. Church was good. It would've been easy to coast and settle. But that's not either of us. And as we talked we realized there was a restlessness in both of us. He had felt it the summer before when he was on sabbatical. I had felt it that summer as well as God began to put on my heart things I was called to do. We were both united in our spirit that God was up to something, could be a hard something, but we knew He was moving us. No clue as to where, when, even why or how this was going to happen. The questions we asked one another brought all of this into focus, but still left much in the dark. And added even more questions. 

I can tell you that the few people we chose to share with before any solid decisions were made, chose to share it as well, and some used it against us. God allowed a few to rise up and offer support and love and prayers but even they couldn't quite get a grasp on what was going on.  In the midst of what seemed chaotic and uncertain, I felt the greatest calm and peace. He led me to scripture that I could claim and hold fast to. He began showing in tiny increments that He had a great plan and no man could thwart it. He began giving my husband a vision and dreams that were God-sized and honestly a bit scary. He definitely gave us perspective on people.  I can tell you that the people we thought would've been there for us in the hardest of times, seemed to fall off the face of the earth. Others came out of the woodwork!  And then those few, who are the friends of, "whatever season you're in, we are in with you", shined brightly. 

There are many things He left me with from this experience. He brought home to me that He is enough! He came through, on time, every time and shattered every doubt I had concerning His plan. He gave me more confidence and boldness to walk in Him and in His way that I never would've had without this season. He taught me that people are not where we place our hope and trust. We place that in Him. Too often in my life I turned to people because I could see them and hear from them clearly. He taught me how to see Him and hear from Him clearly during this time. There were reasons He didn't allow certain people and relationships that we had trusted in to come through for us in this time. For reasons that are still hazy, He wanted us to see some harsh reality and know truth where maybe we had believed lies. And I still don't know why that is. But it gave us a better perspective on people and more belief in Him. I kept telling Him it could've been cleaner and tidier with a big beautiful bow on top. But our ways aren't always His ways. And there were things He wanted us to know that otherwise we wouldn't have and those lessons continue to serve us well. You see He will never allow people to be to us what only He can be. He will not allow that. And in ministry, as well as in life, that is especially helpful and has been since He brought all of this to fruition. He taught me that if everyone else thinks you're crazy, if God has called you to it, you be obedient to Him and believe Him. 

You see, He did move us.  And He has fulfilled God-sized dreams and visions.  He's come through in every way and in ways we didn't even know we needed Him to.  As Lysa says in her book, "the
Devil wants us to fill our emptiness with an unhealthy dependence on the acceptance of others." I've been there before! God forbid I'm ever there again. People make very poor gods! We were not created to be all that others need in any kind of earthly relationship. 

He continues to give me such  gratitude for His great faithfulness and the truth that he will never, ever let me down. And He's given me the ability to grace and love people more and in a healthy way!

Even when you’re overlooked by others, you are handpicked by God. In her new book, Uninvited, New York Times bestselling author Lysa TerKeurst will help you live like you really believe that truth! You can get your copy by going to www.uninvitedbook.com.